and that’s okay. I just need to write. I have no idea which blog this should go on.

saying my heart is confused is an understatement.
I can list four love songs right now that each make me think of different boys.
I can list a million songs that try to remind me to only focus on God.
I can’t give a reason the four have my attention.

one of my problems-Valentine’s day. I don’t care how you slice it, this time of year is the pits for me. I’m so tired of shallow, fake girls getting guys, and….i’m just over in the corner.

I’m tired of people not validating my point of view. I’m tired of watching people make mistakes. I’m tired of trying to stop them. I’m tired of crying for them.

I’m tired of feeling inadequate. I’m tired of feeling like unless I have a boyfriend I don’t know love.

I’m tired of struggling with this. I’m tired of pining to be held. Longing for someone who thinks I’m special. I’m tired of wishing someone would call me and just want to talk to me, just because he thinks i’m worth it.

I’m tired of having such a romantic mind that I think about these things. I’m tired of feeling incomplete. I’m tired of it all. And I’m so tired of crying.

Most of all I’m tired of looking God in the face and deciding His love isn’t good enough. I’m tired of not being patient with Him. I’m tired of it all.

In short, blog, my heart is in a quandry. I just want to go curl up in a ball and cry.

Are you tired of being tired of it all? Let me know; I want to pray for you.


4 responses »

  1. Natalie says:

    I’ve felt like this for the past couple of weeks. I think it’s just winter blues… but then you add in boy issues (long story)… and ta-da! This is what you get. Well, at least for me. (I’m not sure any of that made sense.) I’ll pray for you! :)

  2. Monica says:

    Latte, You are a psychic.

    I'm so sick of feeling shallow because I want a relationship with a guy, and then I feel guilty that I don't feel like God's enough, and then I try to refocus, and then I get distracted, and over and over again.

    Let's be praying for each other. <3

  3. Tiffany says:

    :( I know… how you feel. Exactly. It seems we go through these phases over and over again. But someday we will be done with these phases. We just have to wait it out. until then, we just gotta stick together. :)

  4. Kendall says:

    I agree entirely. See, you have four people in the world who understand what you’re saying! :)

    By the way, thank you for being such a faithful reader and commenter. It means a lot to me.


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