That’s right, it’s time for another classic rambling post :)
I just got finished watching Legally Blonde. It was on TV, and I couldn’t remember if I liked it or not. The story line was pretty cute, the language and low-cut-ness I could have done without however. It was an eh movie. There was, of course, a love story, what chick movie is complete without one, my goodness. Anyway, at the end, it was really just weird. Like, they were totally bashing the ex boyfriend, and all excited for Elle’s fairytale ending with Emmett. yaaay…I didn’t like the bashing. It was very stereotypical, “See, he’s such a loser, you’re so much better without him.” Granted, there are people in our lives we will be better off not pursuing close relationships with, but to find pleasure in their demise is something that really bothers me.
I got to talk to a dear friend today whose engagement got broken off a couple of months ago. She is really hurting, but breaking it off just then was really the right thing to do. And while this guy has really hurt her, she still spoke of him highly, and earnestly desires the best for him. Talk about really loving someone.
All this stuff today has made me start thinking about the kind of girlfriend I will be if some guy is ever crazy enough to decide he wants to date me (I’ll be a handful…). I’m totally afraid that I’m going to be the clingy type. I’m working through insecurities and learning to put my trust and security in Jesus, but I still have this nagging feeling that that will be something I’ll have to fight back. I had this ridiculously amazing dream the other night, and it’s really kind of thrown me for a loop. I don’t want to go into it, but I’ve been fighting off thoughts or perhaps even longings of just sitting on the couch being held by somebody. It’s a terrible thing to have pop in your mind, and I find myself with a stupid smile on my face daydreaming about sitting there someday with somebody special. It’s kind of ridiculous.
Have you ever gone shopping and seen stuff that you could totally make look awesome, but had to turn it down because it was too immodest? Yeah, I really hate those days. They’re really frustrating, it’s like…But that would look sooo good…but see, then by whose standard am I defining “good”? Definitely not God’s, if something that’s really skinny is looking appealing. Because God wants modesty. Every time I have those kinds of shopping days when I’m just so frustrated I want to scream, I just have to remember two people: my future husband, or my brother. The thought of any one of them makes it bearable–still frustrating–but important and worth the annoyance.
Dude, so for my birthday, my dad each got me a Julietta Venegas CD. By far the most amazing thing ever. “Debajo de mi lengua se esconde las palabras que revelan todo de mi…” absolutely wonderful songs. I’m in love.
Oh, so, Saturday I leave for Mexico on a work and witness trip. And yesterday I got asked to lead music while we’re there. Like seriously? Two days before we leave?! But oh well, I think it’ll go well. I’m still kind of nervous, but, it’s going to be all right, because there is a whole stinking lot of God out there.
I’m going to be rooming with my brother’s girlfriend while we’re there. I really hope we can get to know each other better. It’s really annoying because everytime they come down here, they’re being all couple-y (it makes me want to barf) so hopefully when he’s not around she’ll turn into a normal person again and we can talk. I really hate seeing dating people lol. It drives me crazy. And it’s so awkward when they’re here, I’m like a total outcast in my own home. It’s like, mom and dad, Tyler and Ema…and oh yeah, Lindsey. I’m like…seriously people?
So I’m housesitting, and they got me mini M&M’s for my birthday. Totally awesome, the mini’s are like a billion times better than the normal M&M’s. I was so excited lol. I had a horrible craving for them one night, so I seriously went to i think three stores before I found them. That was the best night of studying I have ever had to deal with lol.
So as I mentioned I’m house sitting, and this dog keeps barking and scaring the tar out of me. I’m such a chicken; I can’t handle it when he goes off howling into the backyard and I’m sitting here wondering when the axe murderer is going to burst through the window. AAH I hate being a girl! I need to take self defense classes. Like. now.
Anywho, I think I’m going to…probably play a video game now. Haha. I’ll catch you later!